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Writer's pictureAashita Shekhar

HOW WE CAN CONTROL AND CALM OUR MIND & LET GO



We all have a voice inside our heads that is our constant companion. For the majority of us, this voice doesn’t mean that we’re suffering from schizophrenia. It is a natural part of being human called “thought chatter.” We often aren’t aware that we’re chattering to ourselves, but whether we are aware of it or not, it affects how we feel about ourselves, our lives, our work, and just about everything else. It can bring us up or tear us down unless we learn how to monitor and control it. This starts with our understanding that our brains never stop thinking.

Thought chatter is generally harmless and totally random; it jumps from thought to thought for no obvious reason. Some of this seemingly random chatter helps us make connections to solve problems, create art, make discoveries, and so on. We feel good when it conjures up happy memories, the anticipation of future events, the image of loved ones, and so on, but it also has a darker side. It can turn into a monster that spews a stream of negativity, self-criticism, and doubt. It may judge our every action and decision and keep us up at night. It can become a harpy, digging its claws into us and stealing all joy.

Sometimes we just want to shout, “Shut up!” as if someone else is in control of our thoughts.


While thought chatter may seem out of our control, we have the power to shut it off on demand. The challenge is noticing when it has plunged us into darkness. We do this by monitoring our moods. Like thought chatter, our moods range from positive to negative, and they can change in an instant. We’re elated because we’re off to Greece for a vacation; we’re immediately despondent when our flight is canceled. Our moods go up and down like a perpetual-motion yo-yo, which makes them the perfect tools for noticing that negative thought chatter has taken over. So, how does this work?

Early people couldn’t stop to thoughtfully consider if the saber-toothed tiger lurking in the brush was safe or not. Our brain today makes the same type of instant evaluations. Our mood then matches our thoughts about something. When we deem it as good, our mood is positive, and vice versa. So, if we monitor our mood, we can backtrack to the thought chatter that created it. If our mood is up, the chatter is focused on thoughts that generate positive emotions, and vice versa. Once we become aware of this, we can feed our positive chattering thoughts to keep our mood up, and we can stop negative chatter to improve our mood.

What is your mood right now? Is it up or down? If it’s up, keep thinking those happy thoughts. If it’s down and trapped in an endless cycle of mental chatter, here are actions you can take for negative chatter and feel better.


1. Accept and Address your Thoughts

On average, each of us has around 50,000 different thoughts a day—and some have many more. Become highly conscious of the mental noise. Many of us are in fact not even aware that the mind is constantly thinking. natural and an inseparable part of life. The mental noise is a background noise that never does cease, from the moment accountable to waking up in the morning and right up to the moment of falling asleep at night. Often, it moves to prevent falling asleep. One of the innate characteristics of the mind is the habit of repeating the same thoughts over and over again, as in a loop, like a video or audio that has got stuck. Once there are positive thoughts it is fine. However, too often, these are negative thoughts that do intensify stress, worry, anger, or more so frustration. These are thoughts that are not needed. The human mind does have much capacity to concentrate, also it is observed the more intelligent the mind is, the more it remains distracted and inattentive. This indicates that the mind needs training throughout the day to comply with utmost discipline. There is nothing wrong with thinking, so we have to direct the thinking in the right direction. It is all about controlling the mind and then progressing towards governing the thoughts.


2. Focus on your Physical Sensations and Surroundings

While distractions are bad for productivity, they provide fast relief for a bad mood. A simple way of distracting your thought chatter is to “Focus on your physical sensations and surroundings” Notice how the light bounces off surfaces. Touch everything on your desk, pick it up, turn it over, pay attention to every detail as if you have never seen it before. Feel your feet on the floor, your bottom on the chair, the temperature in the room, the airflow. After a few minutes of this focused activity, notice your mood. It probably has improved; sometimes, you won’t be able to remember what thoughts triggered it, which is good. You don’t want to conjure them up again.

Get absorbed in a book or video game; play chess, word games, or Sudoku with your phone; do something that will grab and hold your attention and quiet thought chatter.

3. Focus On Your Breath

When you recognize your mood is low, just start breathing slowly and deliberately. Focus on the feeling of the air as you inhale, notice the slight pause at the top of the inhale, then sigh as you exhale, and notice the slight pause before the next inhale. Once you’re in the groove, start counting each inhalation and exhalation. You might find that the chatter grows louder and more insistent before it starts to fade.

I automatically turn to a breathing meditation when negative thought chatter becomes unruly and threatens my peace of mind. I just close my eyes, and do this one minute breathing meditation.

4. Stop Feeding the Thoughts

Negative moods are the product of negative thinking about something. When the emotional response to negative thought chatter ramps up, the neurotransmitters associated with stress are released.

• Adrenaline is the fight-or-flight hormone, and it fuels your immediate reaction. Even if a saber-toothed tiger isn’t pouncing on you, your body acts as if it is.

• Norepinephrine is similar to adrenaline, and it enhances adrenaline arousal. Now, you have a double dose coursing through your system. It’s no surprise that your hands start shaking, and you want to run away.

• Cortisol is the stress hormone. It arrives later but serves to keep the arousal going by releasing a new soup of different chemicals.

For example, your thought chatter starts targeting your lack of preparation for an important interview and conjures up memories of past failures. The harder you try to turn it off, the louder the chatter becomes. Your stress mounts, and as it goes higher, a larger and larger surge of this chemical soup floods your body. Your heart is pounding, your muscles are tense, your breathing is short and fast — even though nothing is happening except thought chatter about your interview. So what can you do to short-circuit this assault on your body and mind?

Stop feeding the thoughts. The neurochemicals leave your body in 90 seconds as long as you stop the thought chatter that is triggering them. Set a 90-second timer and consciously breathe or distract yourself until the timer goes off. If you are diligent, at the end of 90 seconds, the chemical soup is gone and so are the symptoms of stress.

4. Control Thought Chatter With Meditation

Research on the benefits of meditation is filled with its calming effects and its ability to quiet thought chatter. People unfamiliar with meditation often picture a yogi, sitting cross-legged on a mat, and immediately decide that’s not for them. But meditation comes with a wide variety of options that don’t require agility, mats, or anything other than your attention.

While you can learn a specific meditation practice, all you need to do is focus on what you are doing as you do it because mindfulness is a form of meditation. The object is to become present and avoid following your thought chatter. A regular meditation practice can be nothing more than sitting quietly in your favorite chair and focusing your attention on one thing — your breathing, the sounds you hear, a meditation object like a worry stone or beads. You can do it while washing dishes, raking leaves, sweeping the floor, riding the train, or preparing dinner.

Don’t expect stellar results right away, and don’t become discouraged if your thoughts steal you away. One minute you’re focused on your breathing, a mantra, or the potato you’re pealing, and the next, you realize that you’ve lost 5 minutes in thought chatter. Most meditators, even long-term ones, admit that their thoughts distract them during meditation. The solution is to not follow them; instead, just refocus your attention on your practice.

Here is the 7-phase meditation you can do to calm your mind.

https://youtu.be/AqXZz43OZ-s

In this meditation,

• we will first focus on bringing our attention to breath, then.

• we will focus on momentary and subtle cellular changes in our body,

• we will focus on impermanence of our mind,

• we will focus on impermanence of the outer world,

• we will meditate on people and relationships in our lives,

• we will become aware of change at every moment,

• we will express gratitude to put a light on those things we currently have going which we are grateful for.



5. Gratitude

Gratitude is one of the quickest ways to amp up your vibration. You can't feel fear or anger while feeling gratitude at the same time.” Therefore, when you feel yourself experiencing a low energy emotion, see if you can shift your attention to gratitude. Keep a gratitude journal. Start each morning reflecting on the people, situations or aspects of your life for which you are grateful. Make gratitude a habit, and it will transform your outlook on life as you start to experience a spiritual awareness and appreciation for the little things.

6. Practice Forgiveness

Blame is a low energy. Out of 22 emotions (arranged from highest vibration at number 1 to lowest at 22), blame is number 15. If you can work toward forgiveness, you will release yourself of this lower energy that can weigh on you like a bowling ball, and up the scale you will go.

One of the most effective techniques to forgive and release negative emotions is the traditional Hawaiian practice of Hoʻoponopono. This traditional practice of forgiveness or reconciliation will help you to open your heart and mind to the many blessings in your life. It is defined in the Hawaiian Dictionary as a “mental cleansing: family conferences in which relationships were set right through prayer, discussion, confession, repentance, and mutual restitution and forgiveness.”

Here is the meditation you can do with me. This healing meditation is designed to allow you direct access to the energetic component of all of your past experiences and allow you to not only gain the benefit of forgiveness but give you the opportunity to let go of the past.




7. Eat High Vibe Food:

Everything you consume is prana, or life force energy. If you eat a lot of “dead” energy (in the form of meat, fried, or processed food), you will lower your vibration. By eating nutrient-dense, prana-rich foods, like local and organic fruits and vegetables, your body literally absorbs these things, making you more light, vibrant, and alive. High-vibration food makes a person’s vibration higher.

8. Reduce or Eliminate Alcohol and Toxins from Your Body:

While it can temporarily feel good, alcohol is a depressant and lowers a person’s vibration. If you want to be clear, spiritually connected, and have a healthy outlook on life, chances are that eliminating toxins from your body would be a good place to start. Rather than numbing out, adopt a more healthful and holistic way of life and see if you don’t feel more energetically abundant.

I understand that it can be tempting to succumb to a feeling of helplessness, and old behaviors and thought patterns. I would encourage you to follow all the above advice and channel your efforts into raising their energetic frequency because this is one of the best gifts you can give to yourself, your family, your friends, and the entire world. When you change, the people around you change. When you lift yourself up, you bring others with you. This is the only way you can contribute to raising the collective consciousness of the world.

9. Love!


And finally, all you need is love! Love yourself, your partner, your environment, and the people around you. Turn your anger, hate, and other negative emotions into positive ones and share them with everyone you meet. Write your words of love on a water bottle, napkin, journal, and other places where you’ll see them through the day! Make a positive affirmation of love to yourself in front of the mirror every morning. Tell people you love them at every opportunity. As you learn to love, your vibration will increase, and you will be loved in return.


I understand that it can be tempting to succumb to a feeling of helplessness, old behaviors, and thought patterns. I would encourage you to follow all the above advice and channel your efforts into raising your energetic frequency because this is one of the best gifts you can give to yourself, your family, your friends, and the entire world. When you change, the people around you change. When you lift yourself up, you bring others with you. This is the only way you can contribute to raising the collective consciousness of the world.


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